1. Change your point of view. Reframe unexpected disasters as potential opportunities. It’s easy to get down when things aren’t going your way; it’s downright human. The individuals who find the silver linings in these disasters (as they arise) ultimately end up with a positive result. Being able to identify these disasters is the first step in the process of changing your point of view. After identifying the disaster as a possible reframing event, the next step is to examine the situation to determine how you do that for the situation.
2. Spend a few minutes now to create value for your workday. This is an integral part of your day. Doing (or not doing) this will solidify your day as a positive one of negative one. You control the goals you set; make sure they are attainable and realistic. Planning and organizing are an integral part of business operations as well as your personal day. If you operate your life like a business (to an extent) you will see a return for your efforts.
3. Utilize your network. The people you know are one of the most important assets in a business and your personal life. They can get you into the door of an exclusive nightclub or even introduce you to the CEO or Amazon. No matter what career they have chosen, the people you know can be a huge resource to you. All you have to do is ask!
4. Don’t feel the need to take a hard stance on a subject until you get all the information. Sometimes you’ll receive news from a boss, associate, friend, or family member. Remember that humans are full of emotions and they act in response to the way they see the world. Everyone has a different worldview and its very beneficial to be aware of that. This is not a section about being politically correct; rather, its about benefitting from understanding and listening to others. You may have less information than you think.
5. Be empathetic. As a general rule, being empathetic is a good thing. When in business negotiations, you don’t want to be too empathetic as it would be impossible to hold your position. Finding a balance of empathy is an important factor in negotiations. A negotiator wants to build a rapport with their counterpart while still maintaining a professional position for their client (or themselves).
6. Pick a healthy escape activity. Sure, having a few drinks with your friends can be a lot of fun. If this is something you do everyday, I would consider taking a few of those evenings and try something different! Take an exercise class, join a bowling league, a running club, volunteer with a youth organization, an animal shelter, just break the mold and try to escape the day to day with something different. Identifying time-wasters and bad habits, setting new & healthy goals, and following through by “cutting the fat” and focusing on attaining those new goals is the simple way to make a significant change in your life.
7. Schedule time for intense thought. Not many people make time for this; most people don’t even know they should be doing this in the first place. Intense thought is time spent alone, without any distraction, with the intent of concentrating on one (or a few) important topics. In order to center back to your true core and remind yourself what is truly important. We all get caught up in our daily lives. Some of the most common reasons are: kids, work, finances, friends, relationships/love life, stress, aging, and mental health (etc.). While these are all problems, many of them could have been solved with intense thought in the first place.
This is not advice to dwell in the past; this is a way to use the past to plan more successfully for the future. I’m going to walk through a few of these problems to explain what I mean. Let’s say kids are your struggle. Did you decide to have children? If so, did you plan adequately for the time and money it takes to raise a child before having the child? Many people make the decision to have a child and have not thought it through; then they are constantly behind schedule and low on money. Taking time to step away from the day to day (5-10 minutes a day is all you need) and plan your life by using intense thought could have helped in this situation. Perhaps a career change or a bit more time is needed before considering kids? Only you know your situation.
Let’s take stress as a second instance. This is a simple and universal topic to discuss. Almost everyone feels stress at some point in their lives and can relate to the sensation. Let’s say you feel stress right now. What is causing this stress? Is it something within your control? Make a plan to change it. It is something out of your control? Use intense thought to realize you cannot change the outcome and spend time on more productive tasks rather than dwelling on something out of your control. Realizing this yourself is the only way to move past these stresses. Intense thought can help with this!
8. Plan ahead as much as possible but live in the present. In order to live your most productive and fulfilling life (in my opinion) is to plan out your life. How could you get where you want to be without creating a plan of how to get there? In school, business, the government, and life, there are calendars and schedules. These are a form of planning. There are many great tools to use out there to help you stay organized and plan ahead! Here are a few that I either like or personally use:
Microsoft To-Do:
SendGrid:
Facebook / Instagram
G-Suite
Audible
Planning is a tool for the successful; taking time to live in the moment in key to mental health. Emotional intelligence and mental health are two areas I feel that people don’t spend enough time cultivating. This moment is a moment in your life that you’ll never be in again; enjoy and appreciate it!
9. Let go of perfection. Strive for it but don’t punish yourself when it doesn’t occur. It’s an infinite feedback loop. It is not possible to be perfect in every way. Imagine a person three feet in height competing in the NBA or Shaquille O’Neill trying to play MLS soccer. This is not an apples to apples comparison with every day life but generally holds true. Focus on your strengths and minimize your weaknesses without placing too much emphasis on them in your plan (unless they are severely affecting it).
10. Keep your goals in front of your eyes; don’t let the goal distract you from how you are getting there.
11. Write things down. Keep a notebook by your bedside.
12. Stay Positive.
13. Get problems and big thoughts in your mind before bedtime (notepad by bedside!).
14. Try to manage your email as efficiently as possible.
15. Meditation.
